


Bad Morning

by Tobezilla



Series: A Happy Omega, A Happy Home [2]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alpha Steve Rogers, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Bucky Barnes Feels, Fluff and Angst, Insecure Bucky Barnes, Mpreg, Nightmares, Omega Bucky Barnes, Omega Tony Stark, Pregnant Bucky Barnes, Pregnant Tony Stark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-07
Updated: 2016-05-07
Packaged: 2018-06-06 21:29:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6770893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tobezilla/pseuds/Tobezilla
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As excited as Bucky had been about the coming baby, his nightmares remind him that he has a past covered in blood and that's not exactly parent material.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bad Morning

**Author's Note:**

> I suppose there could be something considered a spoiler in this story? I guess.

Nightmares plagued the entire team, each of them fighting their own demons. But while the others were accustomed to speaking about the monsters of their pasts, Bucky was nowhere near as comfortable speaking about his own. More often than not, he dreamed about the night he murdered Howard and Maria Stark. How Howard's bones crunched beneath his fist, how Maria cried out for Howard before Bucky held onto her throat and squeezed. He wished he could forget about that night. He wished he would have been strong enough to fight the programming, to go against Hydra. He wished that night would have never happened, that Tony would have never been abandoned at the age of seventeen.

He groaned. Maria screamed loud within his mind, pleading for Bucky to stop and crying out for her deceased husband. Before she died, she breathed out the name of her only son. The tears were enough to shake the Winter Soldier for a moment before he returned to the hideout and was put back under until the next mission. He blinked several times, looking over Manhattan on the roof. Her screams had woken him up, forcing him from sleep.

Unlike Tony, Bucky never cried out or screamed. He would stare at the ceiling for several minutes, sometimes hours, until he gathered the strength to leave the bedroom without waking his mates. He placed a hand on his stomach, the growing bump hidden by an oversized sweater. Could he raise an innocent child? There were moments when he reverted back to the Winter Soldier, losing sight of what mattered and hurting those he loved. Last time, he managed to break Natasha’s arm and knocked Steve out cold. Thankfully, Thor was there to restrain him until he returned to being James Buchanan Barnes and not the weapon Hydra tried to turn him into.

What would happen if he was alone with their children and hurt them? There was a chance he could murder them, not realizing what he was doing until it was too late. He watched the morning light shine on his prosthetic arm, the surface shimmering beautifully. None of them would forgive him. It would only prove to them that he was nothing more than a monster. He wanted to become a parent, to have a family with his mates, but he needed to think about what would be best for the children. Like Bruce, Bucky was incredible at vanishing without a trace. If the situation called for it, he would need to leave his family behind to keep them safe.

“You know how much I hate waking up cold.” Bucky exhaled shakily and shrugged his shoulders. “Needed some fresh air.” He murmured, returning his attention to the city below.

Steve could feel the anguish pulsing through their bond. Soon enough, the overwhelming sorrow would wake Tony from his sleep. He approached the brunette, standing beside him and watched the people move along the streets beneath their feet. “Penny for your thoughts?” He asked, keeping his voice soft.

Bucky smirked. “A penny means nothin’ these days, Stevie.” He chuckled, shaking his head. “Plus, I’m classy. You’re goin’ to need a lot more than a penny to buy anythin’ from me, punk.” Even though he was joking around, the tremulous smile he tossed at his mate sounded the alarms in Steve’s head.

“What’s going on inside that beautiful head of yours?” Steve asked.

He recognized the uneasiness and guilt etched across Bucky's face. Something similar found its way onto his own face when he thought about the past, how different things would have been had he reached far enough to catch Bucky before he fell from the train. He shook his head, returning his attention to his best friend. None of that mattered. Bucky was there, he was no longer being tortured and manipulated by Hydra.

“I keep thinkin’ about Maria. Every single night, I relive the moment I murdered them and her screams always wake me up. Even now, I can hear her screaming for Howard.” He reached up, yanking his hair. “Jesus fuckin’ Christ, Steve. I took a lovin’ mother away from an amazin’ kid. I’m not goin’ to be the reason Tony loses someone else.” 

For several minutes, neither of them breathed a word. Steve was the first to break the silence. “What are you saying, Bucky? Are you going to leave, run away from your responsibilities here?” He sounded angry.

“I’m sayin’ it would be the safest option. I’m not goin’ to take anyone else away from you guys.” Bucky repeated.

Steve huffed. “You keep saying that but how is leaving supposed to accomplish that? Do you really believe we would accept that and live out our lives? We would never stop looking for you. Never, Bucky. Tony would exhaust each and every resource he has to bring you back home. By leaving, you would be taking someone else from Tony. I know for a fact that he would never be able to recover from that. By leaving, you would be taking three people away from our children. Because without you, neither Tony nor I can be complete. I love you, Bucky. We both love you. Nothing is going to be easy. Even without children, this was never going to be easy. But you want to know something?” He brought Bucky into his arms. “It will always be worth it. I would give up being Captain America to keep what we have.” He pressed a kiss against his temple.

Another ten minutes passed in silence. The door behind them opened, revealing an exhausted and worried Tony. He stumbled over to his mates and forced himself between them, ignoring how the soldiers chuckled at him. “Love you, Buck…” He mumbled, resting his head on Bucky’s shoulder.

The conversation would return another day, another time. Even though his mates could take care of themselves, he had an overwhelming need to protect them. Especially Tony. Not that he was weaker but he had been hurt more times than he could count. Bucky had taken away the only person that understood Tony, that loved him even when the entire world thought he was nothing more than a spoiled brat. Steve had a point. Leaving would only hurt Tony. As he held Tony close, Steve holding both of them on top of the tower, Bucky wondered if he could really be the parent their children deserved.

**Author's Note:**

> Greetings, fellow humans and aliens! I'm sorry this second part took forever to post. My brain is rebelling against me and I've been unable to write anything for a while. But I'm back! I do have a request though. 
> 
> I would absolutely LOVE it if you guys would suggest baby names! I have been playing around with names but none of them feel right. WITH THAT BEING SAID, please suggest some names. Put some thought into it. What do YOU think Tony would name his baby? What do YOU think Bucky would name his baby? What do you think STEVE would name the babies? 
> 
> If you choose to help me out, you can suggest a boy name and a girl name for each of them OR even a unisex name. 
> 
> I appreciate the help <3


End file.
